Just so you are aware, undaunted by the great time and distance involved, the great-great-great (and possibly a few more, I darn’t delver too deaply in to the sex life of snails) Snails Of Doom ™ are still on your case Forlath. Much swelled in numbers due to many many (see above) generations the Hoards of the Snails of Doom are coming (soon’ish) . You cannot Run, You cannot hide… Well yes, running is probably a fair defense, and hiding somewhere dry would probably work too, but nowhere is (totally) safe. Cringe in fear Forlath as your doom is coming… Well, stuck in customs in Kazakhstan (geography isn’t one of their strong points) marked as hazardous biological samples, but coming all the same..
[This threat has passed the standards by the guild of mad scientists to be factually correct and adheres to ‘the truth’ a framework set out by small nation states to bring some levels of decency back into the world]
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Hey, how’s it going? What’s that? Haha, fooled you – you have reached Forlath Grey’s answering machine. I’m currently out of the country on safari on Prince Edward Island, home to some of the world’s most aggressive mosquitoes. Please leave a message and I will get back to you at my earliest convenance. If this matter is urgent, involves a large monetary inheritance from a forgotten uncle or has anything at all to do with giant, carnivorous snails sent to slowly digest me in a hideous fashion, please send me a telegram at the Entomology department of “Rick’s house of bugs”, located above the used book shop, across the street from the Cow’s Creamery ice cream stand, in downtown Charlottetown, on PEI. Tell them to use the back stairs, the ones behind the dumpster. Thanks and remember, look to the skies! Especially around dusk, that’s when the little bleeders are at their worst. Ta.
Can’t stop watching electric snail fence vid. Please send help . . . and sandwiches . . .