How to put a Walrus in a Tree

Comments: 11
  • Ezra Yesterday November 14, 2014 09:36

    Fair enough, but you will need to use something stronger like an oak or redwood, that pine is never going to hold 3 Walarai™.

  • Ezra Yesterday November 14, 2014 11:27

    Yes, but there needs to be a grant for Oak v Redwood research, another for wild Walarai™ capture and training… and of course they will need to fund a study for the Envirnmental Impact of transplanted ‘upper branch’ sea creatures. That’s easily another $15-20 million.
    Dont forget the $1 million a quarter stipend for feeding expenses.

    Hmm, probably ought to apply for one for walrus food while you are at it.

  • Ronin November 14, 2014 13:12


    never did I think Id see
    a walrai launched into a tree
    the arc so true, into the sky
    but begs to ask the question


  • Ezra Yesterday November 14, 2014 14:04

    Great, now I have a twisted version of the Reading Rainbow theme stuck in my head…

    Walarai in the sky
    It’s sailing up, don’t know why…
    Wait, can’t you see
    It’s in a tree
    A Blubber Rainbow™

  • Maj. Bastable Fitzwiggins November 14, 2014 17:26

    Tuskawalroos in a tree
    Not oak nor redwood
    But douglas fir room for three
    -silly haiku-

  • Just Justine November 14, 2014 20:50

    maybe, if you adjusted the trajectory, spaced the other two out a bit in the pine, put some wings + halo on the topper, with some strings of lights, viola! ‘O Walrossbaum, O Walrossbaum, wie schön sind deine Stoßzähne!’

  • Ezra Yesterday November 14, 2014 21:22

    By the way, maybe not such a good idea making the application drawing public before they grant the patent.

  • Just Justine November 15, 2014 07:44

    Do a Kickstarter! Only start with a lower goal, it stands a chance…..though it’s not potato salad, and everyone knows the value of potatoes (*USPB), even banshees!
    OMG! maybe make the pledges be only in potatoes!

Post a Comment